Female “privilege”, a point by point response.

This is a point by point response to Mark Saunder’s 18 Points of “Female Privilege”. I don’t normally do this kind of thing, but apparently I’m in the mood to write a list.

This makes more sense if you’ve read his entry.

1) Female “privilege” is being told that you asked to be raped by walking down that street at night, especially if you do so alone.

2) Female “privilege” is approaching folks to ask them out and be accused of being a “d*ke” for making the first move.

3) Female “privilege” is being assumed to be guilty no matter what you did, thanks to Eve and original sin. You didn’t rape that guy when you were drunk, but you were leading him on, so of course he fucked you. It wasn’t really rape.

4) Female “privilege” is only ever seeing women portrayed as beautiful angels of the house that put up with the inept and schlubby men they’re paired with in media because men get to be real and women get to be “pretty” or “nice.” 

5) Female “privilege” is being expected to sacrifice yourself for the survival of everyone around you *unless* you’re on a sinking ship or in a burning building. Female disadvantage is being told you haven’t done enough even if you work all day and come home and pull a second shift. 

6) Female “privilege” is being asked every day between the ages of 22 and 50 when you’re finally going to have kids, and being immediately written off as a “bad” woman for deciding not to have them. (PS – Men can decide not to have kids too, this point is literally boggling to me.)

7) Female “privilege” is having to raise a child for 18 years that you didn’t want because dad skipped town and your county doesn’t have a Planned Parenthood that provides abortion services.

8) Female “privilege” is being told you “run like a girl,” “hit like a girl,” and cry like, you guessed it, a fucking “girl.”

9) Female “privilege” is never being taken seriously when someone rapes you because he wasn’t a stranger with a gun who drugged you, tied you up, and threatened your life.

10) Female “privilege” is knowing that if your marriage stops working and you have to divorce your husband, you have the best possible odds of him deciding that’s the time he’s going to get violent with you.

11) Female “privilege” is being able to call the cops in a domestic dispute to have them tell you that they think you both just need to cool down, and can’t you go spend the night with a friend.

12) Female “privilege” is being expected to be caring and empathetic to everyone’s shit, no matter who they are, or what other demands you might have on your time.

13) Female “privilege” is knowing that bosses think “taking time off to have kids,” or “taking time off to care for your family” (as you’re socially expected to) is not taking your career seriously. It’s also knowing that no matter how seriously you take your career, it will never be seen as seriously as the guy standing next to you.

14) Female “privilege” is being leered at and oggled by the cop, who uses a ticket as leverage to see how far he can harass you.

15) Female “privilege” is having to work three times as hard as the boys around you to get into a good college. Female “privilege” is knowing that teachers will call on your way less often than they call on your prepared classmates. Female “privilege” is being told, “not you again, does anyone else know the answer?”

16) Female “privilege” is having your opinion repeatedly re-explained to you by men who assume you haven’t done the reading.

17) Female “privilege” is being told “We’re past all that sexism shit. So shut the fuck up already.”

18) Female “privilege” is hearing again and again from the same men who are making more money than you, having more leisure time than you, enjoying more success than you, and generally having a better time of things than you tell you over and over how bad men have it to. Female “privilege” is hearing how since you worked your ass off (literally) for everything you have, and some man doesn’t have as much as you, that clearly you’re the one with privilege.

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